


Epilogue: For the Love of Ellana

by Kali_Maa



Series: For the Love of Ellana [4]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-15 19:34:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18676075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kali_Maa/pseuds/Kali_Maa
Summary: Ellana says goodbye. And Hello.





	Epilogue: For the Love of Ellana

**Author's Note:**

> Safe for work, not for feels.

Ellana traveled at a leisurely pace. Walking nearly as much as she rode her mount. She stopped frequently to take in the sights. Relishing the memories.

Some were still painful. Even after all of the time that had passed. So much death and destruction. But many had been replaced by more peaceful, happy memories. 

Everything had changed. She crossed a stream remembering it as a place she had closed a particularly difficult rift.

A water spirit joined her at the crossing. The spirit presented itself as a young woman. Similar in size and stature as Ellana.  Initially wearing a dress made of clear, cascading water, the spirit changed to mimic the travel outfit Ellana was wearing.

“On dhea’him,” the spirit said cheerfully.

“On dhea’him, friend,” Ellana replied.

“Oh, I do prefer the common tongue and I rarely get to use it!” The water spirit twirled gleefully. “May I join you, falon?”

Ellana nodded. Welcoming the company. It had been a long journey. She assumed the spirit was bound to the river so she altered her course slightly to continue along the river’s edge as far as she could.

They mostly traveled in silence. Ellana recognized this particular stretch of land. Suddenly remembering she and her companions had camped nearby. She thought back to Sera telling them about some of the silly pranks she had pulled on various members of the Inquisition. Making them laugh so hard Ellana had tears rolling down her face.

The spirit giggled at Ellana. Latching on to the memory. “That is very funny indeed!”

Ellana laughed as well.

“Does it hurt?” The spirit asked.

Ellana glanced down at the place where she once bore the mark. It was gone now, as was the hand that wielded it. She knew what the spirit was referring to because she had been thinking about it. About holding the anchor in the air to close the rift.

“Not anymore. But even after all of this time, I sometimes still forget it is not there.” Ellana smiled, hiding the hint of sadness behind her words.

“Like when you held your children? You were worried then, but they are quite happy!” The spirit said excitedly, sounding an awful lot like Cole. Like Compassion.

Ellana nodded. Thinking of them. How much she missed them.

“Thank you, falon. I have enjoyed our visit, but you must turn west now. I will leave you to your task.” The spirit said as it washed away in a single wave.

 _They are never good with goodbyes._ Ellana thought. It had been so long since the Veil had been torn down that she hardly remembered life before its absence. Before spirits had become common. Before she no longer required a staff to use her magic. Now all Elves had magic again. Those first years had been difficult years. They had suffered losses. But in the end, the world was restored.

From that restoration she had indeed gained much. The most important being the immortality that she was able to pass along to her children.

She knew how much they had wanted to join her on this journey. But this was something she needed to do alone. Besides, although they were still very young for Elves, they were adults in human years. They had their own lives to live. _There was no need to cater to the whims and desires of a silly old man_. She laughed.

After another day’s journey she could see it in the distance. And with another rise and fall of the moons she finally reached the gates.

Skyhold. Tarasyl'an Te'las.

The place where the sky was held back. The place where she had rallied a nation. The place where she had led an army to save the world. The place where she had found love, lost it and found it again.  

Ellana walked through the gates. Everything was more preserved that the last ‘first time’ she had arrived here. In fact, other than the overgrown foliage it looked relatively untouched.

Ellana supposed that was the beauty of Thedas now. New Arlathan as many had taken to calling it.

Thirty-five years had passed since she had finally left Skyhold with no intention of ever returning. And yet here she was. Neither she nor the keep aging, but both moving forward. 

Slowly she walked through the courtyard. Everywhere she looked held a memory. The entrance to the Herald’s Rest. The stairs to the battlements she often took two at a time. The window to Sera’s room. The place where she had hugged Dorian before watching him leave to return to Tevinter.

It reminded her that she owed her old friend a visit. Soon. Very soon.

Eventually Ellana made her way to the gardens. She gasped at its eternal beauty. Everywhere she turned was covered by beautiful flowers, creeping vines and soft moss. It reminded her of the strange dreams she used to have of Skyhold. Those memories didn’t bring her pain anymore. She was thankful for the life she was given.

 _And here we are._ Ellana thought, finding the spot she was seeking along the edge of the garden. She reached into her pack and pulled out the beautiful engraved box, admiring the intricate design. The flaming sword.

He had wanted his ashes scattered in the place where they first kissed.

Ellana thought back to that night. _Of all the places!_ It had been nearly tragic. But that was her husband. That was Cullen. Always the romantic. It never mattered to him that she had broken his heart here. The only thing that he remembered was that this was where she had kissed him. And that in the end she had chosen to stay with him.

She laughed thinking of how he loved to tell their children. “Your mother kissed me first you know?” Wiggling his eyebrows at them.

Halin would giggle. She was a romantic, just like her father. Tabrin on the other hand?

“Babae, please!” Tabrin would say in a disgusted tone. “No one wants to hear about their parents kissing!” He was so much like Ellana.

“I do,” Halin would whisper to her father. Smiling up at him.

Ellana pressed her lips to the top of the box.

“You made me a promise and you kept it. Thirty wonderful years together my love. What I would have given for a thousand more”.

Cullen Stanton Rutherford had lived to sixty-five years old. Incredibly old for a templar.

In the end the lyrium use of his youth as a Templar had indeed taken its toll on Cullen’s body. He died peacefully, surrounded by friends and family. In Old Ferelden, where they had settled after the Inquisition was disbanded and the Veil had fallen.

Ellana opened the box and let the wind take her Commander’s ashes.

“Dareth shiral, my love.” Ellana whispered. The wetness on her cheeks taking her by surprise. It had been a long time since she cried.

*****

Ellana sat on a stone bench staring at the stars. She had considered going to her old quarters for the evening. But in the end the beauty of her old garden held too strong of a draw. 

Suddenly she felt the world around her shift. As if the ground below her had been pushed. She sensed and then smelled him before she saw him. Crossing the garden towards her. It took a moment for the scene to register in her mind. She was not sleeping. Dreams as she had known them had left with the Veil. She supposed this could be a spirit. Compassion or mischief perhaps? But in her heart she knew better.

Solas made his way across the garden towards her. Ellana cocked her head to the side, taking in his form.

His hair was long and shaven on the sides. The way she had dreamt of all of those long years ago. He wore gilded golden armor that reflected the moonlight. A wolf’s pelt draped his shoulder. Of course, Ellana had heard stories over the years. But she had never paid much heed to them. The most shocking thing of all was Ellana herself. She was actually happy to see her old friend. Her former lover. There was no disdain or malice in her heart.

Solas stood in front of Ellana with his arms behind his back. She could see the apprehension on his face. Unsure if he would be welcome.

“Would you care to sit?” she asked, patting the empty spot next to her.

Solas nodded and took the place next to her.  

“Ellana Lavellan, Herald of Andraste, Former Inquisitor,” his voice was still like hot liquid soothing all of her ills. “In all of these years you have not changed. Your presence and beauty remain unmatched.”

“Nor have you. Fen’harel. I supposed I have you to thank for that.”

Solas flinched at his name. The way she said it feeling more like an accusation. And a rightful one at that.

“Please Ellana. I am still Solas if you will. Although I am in no position to make requests of you. I suspect you have questions.”

Ellana turned her gaze back to the stars. She did have questions.

“How did you know where to find me,” she asked.

“I always know where you are, Ellana. I have never stopped watching you.”

“Why?” she asked.

“Do you really not know, vhenan?”

Ellana turned to look at him. Her gaze unwavering.

“Vhenan?” she asked. Surprised at his apparent declaration of love.

Solas sighed. Understanding her hesitation.

“Ellana. There has not been a moment in the last 30 years that I did not think of you, no moment in which I did not love you,” he said frankly. As if discussing the weather or any other completely mundane fact.

“Then the question remains. Why, Solas?”

Ellana was thankful for the life she had been able to lead. But she still remained curious. He had promised her happiness and then disappeared. Leaving pain and confusion in his wake.

“The day you found me through the Eluvian, I spoke the truth.”

Ellana absently rubbed the nub where her hand was once attached. Remembering the day she had lost the anchor, lost her arm, lost a part of her heart.

“I walked the Din'anshiral. I still may. I may have succeeded in my initial quest but I am unable make any promises. I did not want this life for you Ellana. I had already taken so much from you.”

“Solas, did you ever consider it was not your choice to make?” she replied in a calm voice.  However, a bit of the old Ellana attempted to surface. Heat swept over her body, pulling the readily available mana from all around into her. Ready to battle. Ready to strike down an enemy without warning or mercy. Quickly she suppressed it. Indominable focus.

“A choice, vhenan? No. A gift. You asked me once, what my plans were after Corypheus was defeated. I was not honest with you. I could not share my plan with you at that moment. I needed- …time. I told you I had no plan. However, you talked of future, of love. Of children.”

His voice grew quiet. “Things I knew I could not give you. Not because I did not want to. But because they simply are not possible.” Solas’s voice was sad and distant.

“And how did you know I would find those things after you’d left?” Ellana asked.

Solas gave Ellana a puzzled look. His emotions were much less guarded than when they had been together. “I knew because of who you were, who you are. I have never been in the presence of one as beloved as you, vhenan. I wanted to keep it, keep you for myself. In the end, you were not mine to keep.” Solas ran his fingers over the box that had held Cullen’s ashes.

Ellana nodded, looking down at the intricate wooden box.

“I loved him,” she said softly. Smiling at the memory of his handsome face. Perfectly coiffed gray hair. Deep smile lines from years of joy and laughter.

“And he, you. I am sorry for your loss, Ellana. The Commander was a good man. He protected you and cared for you. He gave you Halin and Tabrin. I am grateful to him.”   

Ellana looked surprised. “You know of my children?”

“Of course. They are Elvhen and they are yours. I have watched over your family since…”

“The wolf in the forest!” Ellana interrupted. “When Tabrin was three he wandered off into the woods. We searched for him desperately for hours. Before dark he came stumbling out of the trees, dirty but unharmed. He shouted to me ‘Mamae, Mamae the wolf brought me home!”

Solas smiled. “He has grown much since then. And Halin is a most gifted mage. Just like her mother.”

They sat in comfortable silence for several minutes.

“And what of you, Solas? Eternity is a long time to spend alone.”

Solas stood and walked a few paces away. He dared not look at Ellana for fear the emptiness would consume him.

“I have only ever loved one person.” He confessed. “Her happiness is my happiness. I watch over her. I go where she goes. If she will have me,” his voice quietly hopeful.

Ellana stood and walked next to him. They stood side by side. Both staring into the night sky.

Ellana reached down and took his hand. Threading her warm fingers through his. She leaned her head against his shoulder. A sense of peace and home flowed through them both.

“So..” She whispered. “What next, vhenan?”

**Author's Note:**

> So I think this is goodbye to my Ellana. I feel like she is a real person to me. Or maybe just me? I got all of the feels writing this. Its the ending I needed.  
> Thanks to everyone that stuck around. The comments and the kudos spur your writers on so leave them leave them leave them. Even on old works. I re-started this one after one comment years after I initiated the first story.


End file.
